Home » Musings » Best things ever #39: New socks

socksSome things need to be savoured, a new wine you’ve discovered, a new author, a song you’ve never heard before (have you ever heard Bob James’s Take me to the mardi gras?), a new shirt, but shut the front door, have you realised lately how great a new pair of socks are? This could well be a sign of old(er) age, or the onset of a new form of overcompensating, but I slipped on a pair of new socks the other day are BLLAAAMMM, yes, ahhh, Hugh Hefner, I mean, EURRRekkaaaakakaakaka, this is what it’s all about. These socks changed everything, I was going to be a better person for these socks, I kissed the dog, I said nice things to people, I was thinking of writing a song, I made someone laugh, I tweeted random nice things to strangers about their cats), this was a moment, something big had happened here, and essentially all because of the great sockness of it all.

It is a well-known fact that Elvis never wore socks.

Joke (sorta).

Peeps harp on a lotttt about Elvis. A lot. Everything that could be said about the King has been said. Over, and over. And again and again and againerer. Then reiterated, then Priscilla Pressers gives her take, then the drummer (allllllways with the drummer) gives his thrupenny bit, then the guy that was Elvis’s friend who spookily only looks about 40 years old (errr, how does that work?) gives his recollection through rose-spray-painted specs. It was true (his cook said so) that Elvis never used a knife and fork, and it is true that back in the mid sixties the King entered an Elvis-look-alike competition and came third, but it ain’t true about the socks, of course he wore socks, he loved his too probably. We’ve heard most it all before, let’s hear something newwwwww.

Here is something you may not know about Elvis (for once). In 1969 he recorded his best (in my humble opinion) album, ‘From Here to Memphis’. There is a reason it was his best album; he wanted it to be so. The King had had enough of recording dross and vowed never to do another song that he didn’t believe in. This album isn’t ‘throwaway’ it isn’t cheese, it is pure pure ahhhhhh awesomeness. Suspcious Minds came from that album, In the Ghetto came from that album, and also a whole load of songs you wouldn’t have heard of before. There’s a song called ‘Long Black Limosuine’ which is just so haunting, so penetratring, it is like he is singing directly to you, it is so engaging, the story, that you are listening, and drinking in every word. Discovering & hearing Long Black Limosuine for the first time was amazing. I was searching for actual Elvis albums, not compilations, actual real albums (and not film soundtracks either). And here it is in ‘From here to Memphis’, get it, listen to it and revel in it, it is a relatively unknown, underated gem (although thankfully Rolling Stone did rate it in the best 500 albums ever, brilliant).

New pants (that’s underpants) are also pretty darn YESSSSSSSSSSSSIrrrreeeee I am wearing new pants, they’re pretty cool too, the added bonus there is that your lower middle area know they’re being hugged by newness, it is their special day. All day you will know you’re wearing new pants, it is not necessarily something you tell people (except that I do), but ahhh you feel great don’t you, new pants day is almost as good as Fridays, and if you combine Fridays with new pants, new socks, new discovering new songs day, well you’ve pretty much got yourself one big massive dynamite fantastmic day there sir or madam, yessssireee, and you can call me Sockman of Sockmannery if it ain’t so.

Am off to buy some new socks and pants.

I think we’ve all learnt something here today.

Peace out.


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