Home » Musings » Superman Jeans

jeansThat was a superfast jampacked raspberrydastardly wobblyjelly mindblowing peach of peaches of whirlwind it’s a twister auntie Em, kinda week, crikeyonyerbikey and you can call me Brenda (how come no-one’s called Brenda any more?) if it ain’t so, why only this week I saw a monkey made of pineapple, a sneeze that covered around five commuters knees, a cat actually in a hat for real (honest guv) and another cat play the entire back catalogue of Prince on a xylophone (When doves cry being the highlight, if you’ve not heard this version before why you have not liveddd madam, you h’ain’t and you can call Brenda up and tell her from me that her bouffant, well it’s bouffantastic, she knows it too).

Look that’s it for this morning, I am not made of hilarity you know, it’s time to put on make-up, it’s time to dress up tight thass right, tight jeans they finally make sense now after all those years, ahhhhhh the jeans, I never thought they would but they did it, those jeantastic jokers, still I cannot find a pair that is quite as satisfying as the Superman jeans I once bought in a Kota Kinabalu market, the studs were Supes’s symbol, and on the back it had a woven S that was the talk of the town wherever I sashayed these dyed powder blue gems, ahhhhh we just won’t see the likes of thems again, but where there is hope there is a goat, and my goats are betting that one day those jeans will fly again.

Squint your eyes and hope, one day we will ALLLLLL have Superman jeans, but this depends on how, if, and when we can harness the power of the group, if we all squint real hard, all of us, even you, yes you, YOUUUUU, I know you’re not squinting, that’s not a squint, nor that, or that, i don’t know what that is, ah youuuuu, I canne stay mad atchoooo I canne cap’n, I cant (what didya call me?). One day, when we all mass-squint at the same time, it will summon the jeans-gods and they will HAVE to listen to us, to heed our cries and our MBDs (Most Base Desires), and lo, Supes Jeans for all, why we will have street parties, garden parties, and maybe even side partings in the sides of our bouffanted hair, who knows, actually I know, I’ve seen the future, and you’re there at the end of the garden party, quaffing wine and munching down on a massive pork pie, you’re laughing, you’re dancing romanccccingggggg la la la la la la lah lahhhhhhhhh, you’re in the mooo ooooddddd and you’re wearing the jeans THE jeans, I’ve seen it happen, it’s gonna happen, the party lasted for weeks and no-one ever ran out of vol-au-vents, bouffants, elephants, pheasants, brazil-nuts, or designer jeans FACT, part of me is there already (my legs).

I’ve learnt things this week Brenda, I’ve learnt that you never stop learning (tell that to my abacus (code for protractor nudge nudge mine’s a pint of pimms)), when you learn you love when you love you live when you live you lollop over mountains, and that’s where we are this morning Friday lollopers, we are lolloping together, why you may even join me in a lollop today. Bloody luv ya I do, have the fickin best Friday ever, it’s already a winner (not as great as Superman Jeans but it’s a start), we’ll get there with your gung-ho, heave-ho, bo-lo (you will fight Bolo) go go additude, FRIDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAYYYYYYYY peace in.

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